Drawn by candlelight

I felt my peace

The glow upon artifacts

Of my life.

I could feel my senses

Arising in the lights

The shadows and flickering

Nuances

Playing before my eyes

I wondered if life would be

Truly this simple and free.

It matters where my thoughts go,

I just can’t seem to remember anything.

and really I ask you,

what makes any of this important.

Is the caressing the edge of sanity?

perhaps just a fantasy on a crisp

autumn day.

This is where my mojo says good bye,

steps away only to see if I can

handle things alone

be a model,

live a life like a neighbor,

the American way.

This little bit of dialogue,

has gone well beyond my

state of mind.

Days when I truly feel like I’m losing it,

and wonder if words

can describe the moment.

Is it spoken word

when all it says is hello.

Can’t figure out the past

yet I hang on

with my every fiber

as a reminder,

this is the travel I took,

I mean explored over time.

As I stand here

I raise the question

are we all like …

Seems we are driven by some

inner energy wanting

it all be the same, because

we’re more comfortable that way.

Being the same, I mean,

I already said that.

I use certain words

and I get scared,

how would society react

all from the comfort

of my favorite chair at home.

is this literature,

stringing words together

that don’t make any sense.

Truth is though,

a story, always being told.

Seems every little thing

I do is monitored.

Paranoid reprisal

while still trying to figure out,

which way to stand.

So maybe life is

revealing itself.

I’m sitting here now,

and the bass is expanding

the sounds all

speak of a different time,

when confusion

was attractive.

I’ll let you go now,

next time.

Half the time

I feel insane

and wonder if it’s a book,

this Saturday night

endurance.

I try to reconstruct

some meaning

like describing

a state of mind.

I wonder if everyone

feels the same,

just over in their own corner,

taking care of

what is their own.

Seems the end game

always speaks of

love,

knowing how to love.

to know the inside

of another person,

what clicks, ticks,

creates a personality.

I stood with you

felt the winter breeze

laughed about the cold

you and me,

me and you

who were we

together,

was it about our look?

Is that it,

are we only wondering,

how to finish the game,

or is truth,

is … truth speaks to our soul.

This moment

so isolated

with a certain intrigue.

It’s always that

this moment,

this one.

Thoughts fly my mind,

and I am taken to these places,

somehow wishing I was a b-rated movie.

In the first place

I was speaking

b-rated actors,

you all know their names.

We live those roles

all of us have milestones

we seem to know

together.

Do you ever wonder

are you chosen

for your sense of urgency

every move on a Tuesday night.

Seems a state of mind

can travel anywhere

choose your confidence

and land with a plan.

Seemingly compelled

riding the wheels.

I used to tell

the tale to help me

get through the day.

I used to believe

my time was my own

until I found

I was losing a grip

on what it was

what did I

what did I own.

I walk alone now

growing old

holding onto memory

trying hard to

not be known.

I’d rather time just

be my own.

Sometimes I wake

you’re in my mind.

Seems the night before

I went to bed

hoping I wouldn’t

find you in my dreams.

Seems I want

to know where your life is

yet I still don’t know

if you want me to know.

Seems our lives are

out there

connected somehow

yet our bodies

appear so far away.

Seems that work every day

with you in my mind.

Seems I’ll never know

any other way.